To create a world where every problem—no matter how absurd—has an ACME solution. Where innovation knows no limits, safety testing is merely a suggestion, and the only question we ask is 'Can we build it?' not 'Should we build it?'

A universe where rocket-powered roller skates, self-inflating life rafts, and portable holes are as common as hammers and nails. Where failure is just another opportunity to sell replacement units, and customer loyalty is measured in repeat purchases after spectacular mishaps.

To be remembered not for building products that worked perfectly, but for building everything—and letting the market sort out the details.